♠ | 022 | Video

[lastrat]

[This is not the face of a man well content with life. This is the face of a man pissed off at having slept for God knows how long.]

First he puts me to sleep for weeks, then he asks me to look after a child. I'm beginning to wonder if he actually expects redemption.

Weren't we just in port? [Fuck this ride, fuck the Admiral, grump grump grump.]

[Private to Ellie]

Meet me in the gym.

[Private to the Admiral]

I would comment on the fact that I'm a grown man and haven't written a letter to Father Christmas in decades, but I've the feeling it will fall on deaf ears.

Take your letters and sod off.

[And because he literally cannot resist, a check list.]

Vesper	.....	something for the cat to take a spin in.
Cassel	.....	a tailored suit. a bottle of fleur de champagne. condoms. [There was nose wrinkling.]
Peter	.....	a new camera. extra film/memory cards.
Chris	.....	a pomeranian.
Ellie	.....	something for the bloody sheep.
Selina	.....	the most expensive piece of art in the world. a french-english dictionary.
Elena	.....	twilight. [because he could do a thoughtful gift but why when he can bring sparling vampires into her life.]
Daneca	.....	copious alcohol. a martini glass. no - six martini glasses. she has to catch up.
Stark	.....	a toy sword. with plastic flames. lights up. etc.
Lark	.....	a stuffed dog.
Bush	.....	ship in bottle. hms nonsuch along its side.
Babs	.....	a little first aid kit. with a sign that reads 'FOR WOUNDED PRIDE' on top.
Natasha	.....	some russian cold war gadget. something ridiculous.
Abigail	.....	something with crocodile skin. boots, purse, i don't care.
Archer	.....	an invisible gun. maybe he'll shoot himself.
Esther	.....	a dead rat. [Because he will always be the last rat standing >(]

Comments

[private]

[lastrat]

[He's looked through the file already, in brief, and he knows she's likely right. He spotted mentions, short details, and so he doesn't really answer.]

She's a soldier in a war. [And she's too young for it. He does manage a wry smile, there.]

You wouldn't make me break out in hives, now would you Iris?

Re: [private]

[routemistress]

Was a soldier. I know that sort of thing takes a while to wear off. Poor kid. You can show 'er how not to cope by example.

Since when are you allergic to whiskey, you pillock?

[private]

[lastrat]

We'll see. [Things like that never really go away. He knows that well enough.]

Well I'm not usually slathering it on myself. Seems like a waste of good whiskey.

[private]

[routemistress]

You'll be fine.

[She knows you do.]

Do you want me to give you a full chemical rundown? It's not made of whiskey. It's a warming carrier oil with some of the same esters that make whisky smell of whisky. I mostly made it for meself. 'Cause I want you all to smell good.

[private]

[lastrat]

It warms my heart to know that whiskey smells good to you.

[private]

[routemistress]

It's fantastic. All warm and ...whiskeyish. I've also made it nontoxic. Not that I plan to lick it off you at all.

[She's saving that for someone else.]

But someone might want to, eh?

[private]

[lastrat]

Can't hurt to have in a back pocket. [He knows Vesper isn't a fan of his drinking; he's fairly positive she'd have no interest in whiskey-smelling massage oil.]

I'll stop by in a bit. [....But it sounds pretty decent to him.]

[private]

[routemistress]

I'm warming me 'ands.

[private]

[lastrat]

You're a professional.