lastrat | ♠ | 022

[This is not the face of a man well content with life. This is the face of a man pissed off at having slept for God knows how long.]

First he puts me to sleep for weeks, then he asks me to look after a child. I'm beginning to wonder if he actually expects redemption.

Weren't we just in port? [Fuck this ride, fuck the Admiral, grump grump grump.]

[Private to Ellie]

Meet me in the gym.

[Private to the Admiral]

I would comment on the fact that I'm a grown man and haven't written a letter to Father Christmas in decades, but I've the feeling it will fall on deaf ears.

Take your letters and sod off.

[And because he literally cannot resist, a check list.]

Vesper ..... something for the cat to take a spin in. Cassel ..... a tailored suit. a bottle of fleur de champagne. condoms. [There was nose wrinkling.] Peter ..... a new camera. extra film/memory cards. Chris ..... a pomeranian. Ellie ..... something for the bloody sheep. Selina ..... the most expensive piece of art in the world. a french-english dictionary. Elena ..... twilight. [because he could do a thoughtful gift but why when he can bring sparling vampires into her life.] Daneca ..... copious alcohol. a martini glass. no - six martini glasses. she has to catch up. Stark ..... a toy sword. with plastic flames. lights up. etc. Lark ..... a stuffed dog. Bush ..... ship in bottle. hms nonsuch along its side. Babs ..... a little first aid kit. with a sign that reads 'FOR WOUNDED PRIDE' on top. Natasha ..... some russian cold war gadget. something ridiculous. Abigail ..... something with crocodile skin. boots, purse, i don't care. Archer ..... an invisible gun. maybe he'll shoot himself. Esther ..... a dead rat. [Because he will always be the last rat standing >(]

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Why the gym.

[Dryly:] Because I can make you run laps more easily there. [Not actually the plan.]

You can't make me run laps anywhere.

We could could continue this darling tete a tete, or you can look over your file.

I was there. I don't need to look it over.

Then why don't you tell me what you do need.

You're the adult, aren't you?

You're the one living in a room you don't like.

You're offering to change it?

Are you asking?

Maybe.

No, no maybes. Tell me what you want or don't, but I'm not going to guess.

What if I don't know what I want?

Then we'll sort that out. I certainly can't tell you.

I know you can't.

[ She's hugging herself, tight. ]

It's just... it's home, and it's not home. I'd rather live in the bush. But I can't exactly pitch a tent in the CES, can I?

I wouldn't recommend it. Things tend to go bad, there. And who knows what will happen to your tent, when the scenery changes.

Personally, I'd prefer somewhere with air conditioning.

I don't want to talk about my file in the gym.

What do you want to do?

[He can be gentle when he needs to be. Letting her decide things feels for the best.]

Don't know.

I guess maybe in the pen, with Matilda.

[He is actively repressing a groan.] Wonderful.

[not wonderful!!!] And where did that end up?

You're the one who wants me talking.

It's in the gardens. [ She describes the place. ] And good thing she's not so stinky anymore.

Yes, very good.

I'll meet you there in ten minutes.

[ She's there. And horribly nervous. She feels awful, a big sinking pit in her stomach. The lamb notices, and keeps well away from her.

So Ellie's sitting alone, on a bale of straw. ]

[He follows her directions easily enough, and finds her sitting on the bale. When he approaches, he elects to lean against the fence instead, to save his clothes.]

Hello.

[ Hay is really uncomfortable and a little prickly, but she sits crosslegged up on it anyway, leaning her elbows on her knees. She doesn't have any fine clothes to protect, after all. ]

Well? Have you read it?

private

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Vesper	.....	something for the cat to take a spin in.
Cassel	.....	a tailored suit. a bottle of fleur de champagne. condoms. [There was nose wrinkling.]
Peter	.....	a new camera. extra film/memory cards.
Chris	.....	a pomeranian.
Ellie	.....	something for the bloody sheep.
Selina	.....	the most expensive piece of art in the world. a french-english dictionary.
Elena	.....	twilight. [because he could do a thoughtful gift but why when he can bring sparling vampires into her life.]
Daneca	.....	copious alcohol. a martini glass. no - six martini glasses. she has to catch up.
Stark	.....	a toy sword. with plastic flames. lights up. etc.
Lark	.....	a stuffed dog.
Bush	.....	ship in bottle. hms nonsuch along its side.
Babs	.....	a little first aid kit. with a sign that reads 'FOR WOUNDED PRIDE' on top.
Natasha	.....	some russian cold war gadget. something ridiculous.
Abigail	.....	something with crocodile skin. boots, purse, i don't care.
Archer	.....	an invisible gun. maybe he'll shoot himself.
Esther	.....	a dead rat. [Because he will always be the last rat standing >(]